The world's newest CUBS fan!!!
We are ecstatic to share our wonderful news with everyone....
Long story, short: We are pregnant and baby is due in January 2012! Since day one, Brecken has said that it would be a "girl" and he wanted a "sister." We'll be finding out in just a few short weeks so we'll see if his predictions come true!! In the mean time, he's been "looking at baby" for several months now. He is convinced that he actually has to LIFT MY SHIRT up in order to "see" baby.
The long version is below, if you find yourself incredibly bored at the office tomorrow :)
Since getting a positive pregnancy test in the Oak Grove Middle School bathroom in the early morning of Friday, May 13th while waiting for a department staff training to start, I feel as though I have been holding my breath...
I have been hopeful that baby would be healthy and we would be blessed with the wonderful opportunity to be parents again, yet almost waiting for bad news to come our way :( Thankfully, there has been nothing but great news with this little one. Given my pregnancy history, we have had weekly check-ins and many ultrasounds since I was just 5 weeks pregnant and this little one is a HEALTHY rockstar with a current heartbeat in the 150's!!
The most beautiful sound in the world is a baby's heartbeat. When we were pregnant with Brecken, I thought it sounded "weird" and "wooshy." I also thought it was "cool," but took for granted that that little sound would always be there; That I was guaranteed to have a healthy baby at the end of it all; That I would bring my baby home from the hospital and be blessed with the opportunity to love him and cherish him each day; That my baby would grow up and have friends and interests and birthday parties and all that comes with being a kid. Despite the many scares that my pregnancy with Brecken would bring, we WERE blessed with that living, breathing, wonderful little soul to spoil and love :) Last Fall, we experienced the heart ache of going to a doctor's appointment and NOT hearing a heartbeat. We felt the anguish of broken dreams, lost hope, and a burning sense of unfairness. After going on to experience yet another lost baby, we were met head on with crushing failure and a feeling of absolute despair. Mixed in with all of this was the loss of my beautiful mother and it is safe to say that I officially lost all hope in the world.
On June 1st, we SAW a beating heartbeat at an ultrasound. Hope, optimism, and excitement were great feelings to feel again and I felt like I genuinely smiled for the first time in months.
The tiny little "gummy worm" (as I've dubbed baby) at 6 weeks...
Gummy Bear at 8 weeks...
I can honestly say that I was more nervous the day of that first ultrasound than any other day of my life. I held my breath throughout the ultrasound until I saw the tiny flicker of movement and the technician assured me that everything looked GREAT. Emotion swept over me and I couldn't stop the tears.... Tears of happiness and hope, tears of bittersweet sadness that we wouldn't be having THIS baby at THIS time if we hadn't lost earlier ones, tears of devastation that I couldn't call mom following this appointment as I had all the others in my past. Tears, and a lot of them. I had to remind myself that HAPPINESS was at least a portion of the tears :)
The weekend we found out our good news was hard for me. I was excited but couldn't imagine telling ANYONE without telling mom first. I had to find a way to feel like I was telling her so we came up with balloons. The day after we found out, we bought two balloons to send up... I wrote a message on one and Brecken's balloon said, "Grandma, I'm going to be a big brother!" For WEEKS following the send up, Brecken was talking about how he "send boons up high in sky, gamma get them!"
As for telling Dad, I again couldn't imagine telling him without mom being there or having a part in it. Soooooooo, here is what I came up with....
On a weekend Grandma Gott flew in from Arizona, I had her pick-up an order of balloons and take to the cemetery...
When Dad stopped for his daily visit, he was probably a little surprised to see random balloons!
The card said, "I wanted you to hear the news from Mom! Love, April"
Dad even sent me an email the other day saying, "I hope you're feeling good. Make sure you're eating for two, you know mom would be telling you that." I LOVE IT!
Jim and Madeleine found out at B's 2nd birthday party. Eric gave B an ultrasound picture to give to Grandma and the picture obviously spoke for itself :) Unfortunately, I didn't know Eric was doing it so I didn't have my camera armed and ready... That and there were too many hugs coming my way after the news spread across the lawn to take pictures anyway :)
As for telling the world, I was excited about my "Cubs creation" that I put together for our trip to Chicago last weekend. The shirt is not only cute but if you've ever been to Wrigley with me, you know the message is TOTALLY ME!
Unfortunately, the iron-on didn't last through the second inning..... Hmmmmmmm.... Perhaps it was in small part because my stomach was ACTUALLY growing with each new item from the concessions?!?
To answer the questions that several of you are thinking right now.... NO, I haven't been puking 80 times a day like I did with Brecken.... YES, I have been feeling "good"... YES, we will find out if we're having a boy or girl (in just 3 weeks!!!)... NO, I will not sob hysterically if I find out we are having a boy again.... NO, I don't plan on repeating the 14 weeks of bedrest!!!! I started taking weekly progesterone shots that will go throughout the pregnancy and *HOPEFULLY* prevent preterm labor from happening again, thus eliminating bedrest and and early arrival into the world :)
Being on summer break has definitely helped me hibernate and let me go at my own pace in sharing our wonderful news. There really isn't an easy way to "hide" any more though, as baby as certainly popped out!!
5 Weeks
17 Weeks
We are very happy and not a day has gone by that I haven't felt blessed for our impending joy.